“Apology” is very much in the news these days.

A Houston ethnic newspaper publishes a low level and even illegal joke (from the point of view of the current US Homeland Security Guidelines) and the Sikhs all over USA are up in arms demanding an apology.¹ More recently Sultana Begum, the great granddaughter-in-law of the last Mughal Emperor, Bahadur Shah Zaffar presented herself and apologized for the extreme cruelty perpetrated by her ancestors.²

Now consider the Sikh community and the way our affairs are run. Can any intelligent Sikh accept an apology or agree with the symbolic punishment of a tankhah that includes a donation of Rs.1000.00 worth of parshad or cleaning the shoes at the Gurdwara, and get pardoned for crimes that, in most cases, have done irreparable damage to the entire Sikh nation, our reputation, and to the collective Sikh psyche. We are told of the tradition of the jathedar of the Akal Takhat, Akali Phoola Singh, who had inflicted a punishment of forty lashes on Maharaja Ranjit Singh.

Our present leadership has made mockery of every Sikh institution and the so-called “Sikh judiciary” is even worse. For offences that have resulted in extreme damage to the Sikh nation, people have been let go off after being sentenced a tankhah. The correct thing would be to encourage the offenders to reform themselves and thus gain the realization how their actions were hurtful to others.

When children make mistakes we ask them to apologize. Reluctantly a child may tender an apology. But, does the child realize the mistake. Children recognize authority and immediately, even though reluctantly, submit to it. A well-researched book on the subject of transactional psychology is I’m Ok, You’re Ok.³ Through the model of Parent-Child relationship, the author attempts to explain how authority is exercised in our relationships with people.

A resident of Howrah in West Bengal and the great granddaughter-in-law of Bahadur Shah Zafar, Sultana Begum, seeks forgiveness at the Golden Temple in Amritsar on Tuesday for the atrocities committed by the forefathers of her husband on Sikh Gurus and Hindus. Her granddaughter Roshan Ara is also seen in the picture. — PTI photo

I have heard many local Sikhs demanding that Sonia Gandhi apologize for the events of 1984. In the absence of a Parent-Child relationship model we lack any authority over her which may explain why an apology has not been forthcoming. Let us not forget that an apology that comes from remorse is sublime.

Take the case of Sultana Begum. Did Sikhs ask for her to apologize? Not that I know of. She was not the person who perpetrated atrocities against Sikhs. She had nothing to gain by apologizing. She was not standing for public office. It is her inner remorse, which was reflected in her tears as she stood before the Akal Takhat. The so-called clergy refused to accept it unless she provided them in writing a proof of her lineage. What were they thinking?

A few months ago in the state of New York a Gurdwara was destroyed in an apparent case of arson. The culprit was caught and tried in court and punished, but the local Sikh sangat “forgave” him. Although I understand the need to accept an apology we must not forget that an apology without intent is of no use, unless people seeking pardon demonstrates that they are truly ashamed of their actions and genuinely reformed not to commit crimes in future.

If we ask any of the perpetrators of 1984 killings in Delhi and other communal violence in India to merely apologize we will stand to gain nothing. My point is that we should not put too much emotion on efforts that are inconsequential. Rather let us find a proper closure that will help us move on and build a better future.⁴

President Ronald Reagan is my hero. His recent death brought back my admiration for him. No matter what some critics may say, he is the one who had an infallible faith in America. Out of this faith he derived tremendous courage. His courage was outwardly visible in his ever confident and smiling face. You cannot imagine President Ronald Reagan with a worried look no matter how horrible the situation is. Inwardly, his faith gave him the strength, wisdom, and courage to take very bold decisions.

After World War II, we witnessed the Cold War that was destructive and depleted our economic resources. We always try to measure the effects of a war in casualties. There were hardly any casualties in the Cold War, but the fifty years of it was a drain on our planet’s economic resources. It had a debilitating effect on the human psychology. Historically, economic consequences of war have been the reason for the downfall of some empires.⁵ I admire President Reagan for having won the cold war. The results of this victory were spectacular – the collapse of the Soviet Union. Today, the world fights another war: The war against terrorism.⁶