While the Canadian, British red passport continues to be clinching item for finalizing marriage of a daughter abroad there is little discussion on what happens when the young brides relocate to a new country. There has been a marked increase in partner violence against newly immigrated young women from India in US, UK and Canada. In Punjab there are 10,000 women who have been abandoned by their husbands living abroad. After collecting fat dowry their husbands failed to call their spouses. The last that many of these women have heard from their husbands has been through divorce papers sent through Express Post.
Back in India, and especially Punjab, houses continue to have airplane shaped water tanks starkly projecting the need to get out of India and immigrate at just about any cost. While Canada, UK and USA are traditional favorites, the list of countries to immigrate now include Italy, Norway and even Cyprus. Parents see a good future for their daughters magically hoping that they will roll in money and have blissful married lives as soon as they fly out of the country.
In sharp contrast, partner abuse is becoming more and more common in North America. Members of NGOs working with the abused women say that for every case of violence reported there are countless others which go unreported. Women continue to face abuse by their husbands and their families silently as they have little knowledge of laws and little awareness of their rights in the new country.
Every now and then cases of partner abuse come to light. Some months back a woman with bruised voice box checked into a Toronto hospital after being choked by her husband. Hospital staff said she had to be convinced to report abuse. In another case, neighbors called police when they heard screams from a tenant abusing his wife. Not many women report abuse voluntarily. The reason for that are not hard to find. The challenges that girls coming from India face are many. They are totally dependent on their husbands for showing and teaching them the ways of the new country. Once violence starts at home they continue to be in an abusive relationship living with a hope that things will change for better. Some of the challenges they face include how to learn English, win custody of their children, obtain welfare from government, master public transport and find full-time jobs which would help them sustain their lives.
According to Punjabi Community Health Centre, an NGO working in Brampton region of Toronto, the police does not have culturally appropriate support for South Asian women. The police is geared towards helping women born and brought up abroad who fight tooth and nail against abusive partners--a far cry from girls raised in India who are trained not to question authority. Then there is always a mind-set that violence will stop, and it is always better to remain silent than instigate fights which end in bashing.
When women are without status or married to a person who is living without status their situation becomes even more dreadful. Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell is a campaign in Toronto which hopes to bring across a public policy in cities where municipal officials and the police need not inquire about the status of immigrants. Such a policy exists in 23 states in the US. According to DADT women without status fail to report domestic abuse as they fear that they will be deported back when the police gets to know about them. As a result, they continue to suffer violence at home.
There is a need for more subsidized day care, housing and greater employment for women who want to make it on their own and wish to separate from their husbands.
